Rocky and Bullwinkle-and the Fungi
of the Evil Plotting Emperor
It’s true that Bullwinkle the Moose is
not the sharpest tool in the shed, but when it comes to being loyal and
working as a team, Bullwinkle is best there is. Actually you can
say that Bullwinkle is sooooo stupid that he is extremely brilliant.
This is because he kind of stumbles on answers to his problem, both figuratively
and literally. His side kick Rocky is a high fly’n butt kick’n squirrel
who is always trying to talk sense into Bullwinkle. I don’t think
he ever has succeeded in doing so but he always tries.
These days Bullwinkle has been into hunting.
It doesn’t matter what he hunts whether it be bugs, salamanders, or bunnies,
it’s all the same to him. One day Bullwinkle found a new species
of...well he's still not so sure what it is. It looked something
like a lugee from Mars that had been stepped on too many times. It
had an appearance of a greenish yellow blob of pudding and Jell-O, it was
a foot tall and a foot wide. Each time Bullwinkle shot one of the...uh..mm..lets
call them fungi, each time he shot one of the fungi they would splatter
into a practically a million pieces and each piece would bounce around
wildly all over the place. This species quickly became Bullwinkle
favorite animal to hunt. This turned into a favorite pastime, then
into a hobby, and soon it was an obsession. Bullwinkle could not
stop hunting these animals. If for some reason he was not able to
shoot at least one fungi in a day, Bullwinkle would become enraged.
Rocky had seen this problem grow from day one. He tried many ways
to convince Bullwinkle to stop his obsession. So like a drug, this
obsession controlled Bullwinkle’s mind to obey the fungi of the evil plotting
emperor.
Rocky had been watching what used
to be a fun pastime for Bullwinkle start to control him. Rocky took
mental notes on his behavior, and after months of observations he concluded
this. This was no ordinary obsession, and there has got to be more
than this slime splattering fungi, something else is behind this.
The gossip around the woods was that
an odd looking neighbor resembling slime had moved in near by. This
gave rocky the clue to take a visit to his good friend the slime.
As he reached the house of the new
resident, it looked as if no one was there. Quietly Rocky crept into
the house and commenced the investigating. He looked along the gloomy
wet, walls. One item on the wall caught his attention. It read,
“New voted emperor of planet ZeEbEzZ.” It looked like a weird newspaper.
After that a second one said, “ZeEbEzZ emperor voted off planet.”
Under the heading it had a picture of a slime-like animal. Rocky
noticed a light coming from a nearby room, along with that he heard some
clutter and pacing in the room. As Rocky neared closer to this mysterious
room the sounds became more clear. Bubbling, splashing, and hissing
was all heard as Rocky put his ear close to the door. He felt hot
sticky, steam grasp his face as he slowly peered in. Finally Rocky
got a look in side. Thousands of the exact same creatures Bullwinkle
had become obsessed with were crawling, sliding, and even hopping all over
the ground. Rocky strained his eye to the left and saw a bubbling
boil of green slime with slime crawling out. He then noticed the
same thing that was in the picture of the emperor. The emperor had
his back turned to Rocky and seemed to have what looked like a bird in
a trance obeying his every will. The emperor chuckled the evil laugh
and screamed out in joy.
“Now every thing will become obsessed with my fungi
and I will rule!”
Rocky had heard enough, he turned to leave, but
suddenly a shriek broke the silence. Rocky whipped his head around
and saw in amazement through the door as all the fungi were looking at
him.
“How did they know,” Rocky thought to himself.
Rocky never did know how they heard him but he did know
that they were all chasing him. Rocky raced out the door and slammed
it behind him. That slam was so big that it actually knocked the
whole house over, causing everything in it to die.
When Rocky returned home he met Bullwinkle
who was back to his normal self, which may not be good, but was better
than before.
Bullwinkle found a different hobby
of collecting worms. He can’t help but sometimes squeeze one of the
worms and watch as jelly dribbles out.